Beyond Infertility

February 18, 2010

Rare

Filed under: Uncategorized — beyondinfertility @ 11:36 am

Last night, without any nudging by me, my husband reached out to his parents.  It’s a very rare thing for him to do.  He told them how he was nervous and upset about the possible diagnosis.  He laid everything out there.  As it turns out the biological daughter was there visiting them.  His mother simply couldn’t help herself.  Bio daughter is here, but I keep waving her off.  Do you want to talk to her?  My response, you have to be freakin’ kidding me!  My husband is clearly trying to talk to you about our child here under this roof.  Can you take your damn one track mind off of that girl for one second and focus on one of your other grandchildren for a moment?  Clearly not.

My husband said she went through the motions, but the conversation died after she asked him the question.  He didn’t want to talk to her anymore, and they quickly hung up.  Something they could have talked to him about for some time, ended up in a three-minute conversations.  They wonder why he keeps them at arm’s length.  They hurt him last night, and they are too dense to even realize it.  Now his mother will play the injured party, claim that my husband is distant and cold…hard to get to know.  May I say, that my own parents don’t find him distant and cold.  They do think he can be difficult to understand, because he holds his cards close to his chest.  However, they do know that with patience, time, honesty, and talking to him, allowing him to feel, they will learn what’s going on.  They love him like a son, and it boggles my mind that his own parents don’t know his as well as mine do.

My husband’s response last night was classic, “Um, don’t you think this is kind of a bad time?”  Her response, “Oh.”  They make me want to pull my hair out.  #%$@^@#!  Ahhhh!  Enough said.

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2 Comments »

  1. I just don’t understand people. My parents know BigP better than his parents do. My family send him cards and call him for his birthday – his parents don’t call or text or send him anything.

    I’m sorry they didn’t listen to him. I’m sorry they hurt his feelings – again.

    Comment by Heather — February 18, 2010 @ 12:59 pm | Reply

  2. How frustrating. I guess your in-laws have an agenda regarding the girl, and can only focus on that. I’m sorry they let you down.

    Comment by a — February 18, 2010 @ 2:11 pm | Reply


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